mama's favorite form of discipline...

maybe not so favorite for the girl!

(disclaimer: she claimes it was a serious endeavor to create a flying elephant
out of the paint on the kitchen table. it was serious alright, this mama said.)

 

 i'm not sure if it's quite working as a really-sink-in form-of-discipline anymore.
she used to sob the whole way around the house with this thing.
note: winter ear-covering hat is worn to block out "torturous sounds".

punisher...we may need to be replacing you for a further upgrade on
what really-gets-the-lesson-to-sink-in.

in our house...when you chose to destroy things or make messes,
you work doubly hard to put it back together or clean something else up
(if painting tables is not in your repertoir).
seems to get the job done for the most part, but looking at the face on this little offender,
it may need to be shifted a wee bit.
hmmmm, praying for more creative juices to flow on getting this little heart trained...

hanging onto this one these days...
If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and He will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. -James 1:5

mamas and their babies and THEIR babies!

What a sweet and special joy it has been to grow in size and number with my treasured sister-in-love!
Babies babies on the way,
in some very very short days! 

 

Mama Kitty is making these 2 grandma's very proud and happy...
she's providing them each with one of their own babies...a boy AND a girl!
We all couldn't be more ready to squeeze the twin-y baby loves!

CONGRATS mama Kate and daddy Thys!
Your new world is going to turn you upside down and right side out
in all the best most unbelievable joy-filled ways!

"it's just too hard to obey!"

We had another 3-yr-old-speaking-louder-truth-volumes-to-mama,

than the other way around, moments the other day.

The little Bug was on mama's bed,
rifling through small choking-hazard items on daddy's nightstand, 

desperately searching for her fav-o-rite 1/8 of a piece of Extra gum.

After much searching (as I'm laying beside her watching the frantic search), 

which ended in futility, she discovers a handful of coinage!

Jackpot!

Only because this mama has had personal experience as a 5 yr old herself, 

swallowing a nickel that had to be surgically removed,

there may be a little heightened paranoia sensitivity 

to playing with small metal valuable round objects in this home.

Anyways, off the point.

Just giving you the scenery.

So, as little one is huurahing with her handful of richness, this mama quickly replies with a...

"Honey, we don't play with money, so please put that back in daddy's junkbox right now."

There may have been a firm tone behind those words spoken.
This mama doesn't mess around with niceties when it comes to choking hazards. 

Especially shiny ones.

The little one quickly obeyed, knowing coins are seriously off-limits in this house 

and that mama reeeeeealy meant business.

Only her response really shocked me,
It wasn't the typical 3-yr old rant of injustice and absolute disgust
with the mama for thwarting her little, but BIG will.

She all out broke down,
but with tears and a heart and cries of absolute defeat
and of one that felt the weight of the world completely crushing her.

I knew it was a different response
so my mama-heart didn't respond immediately to the rebellion
but started questioning the broken-hearted sound,
knowing there was more to the story behind the tears.

"Baby, I need you to use your words and let me know why you are so upset
about not finding gum and having to put those coins back.
What's going on babe? Tell me more."
All I could hear out of defeated mama-heartwrenching sobs were the words...

"it's just too hard!"

"Oh baby, what's too hard?? Tell me more about it."

"it's just too hard to obey!! i don't like to obey!"
More deep breath-stealing sobs ensued.

Oooohhhh, so there was more to the story!
The mama light turned on and I realized
it wasn't just simply that we were out of her favorite gum supply
or that she couldn't play with the coins as she was hoping I'd delight her with...

she was down and out broken-hearted that it was so hard to obey mama
and she just flat didn't want or like to do it.
(yet still chose to do it even in her sheer determination not to...
only GOD folks, could step into moments like that.)

Ohhhhh my, does this mama understand that very real and strong-feeling'd logic.

And isn't there really always more to the story with them? 

More to get to the heart of?
More to help them dig and discover?

Because don't we need that in our grown-up "training to be like Jesus" bodies too?!
Someone to help us dig a little deeper to really see/know what's eating at us,
 more than the small issue in front of our faces?

So, I proceeded...

"Baby, I SO get it. I SO struggle to obey/like/even want to, often, with my Heavenly Father too.

Do you know that Jesus asks mama to do things, and there are times when I want to just shout 'NO!
I don't like that plan. You need to pick another one that fits me and what I like better. I want to play with that thing that isn't good or dangerous for me. I want to have what I want the minute I want it.
I don't want anyone standing in the way of my will and my ways. Don't you get that Jesus?!'

You are NOT alone baby, mama struggles with feeling sad sometimes too,

because to obey, is never the easy way.
But it's always the better way. The safer way. The more fun way.
The more rich way. The more full way. The worth-all-the-hard-work way.

And SOOOOOO, do you know how we talk about you needing to pray
to ask for Jesus to help you obey the things mama and daddy ask you to do
to keep you safe and well and healthy and in a good relationship with us?
Do you know that mama has to pray that He would help her heart obey every day too?!

For different reasons, but the same way.

Can I pray with you honey?
And we can ask Jesus, together, to give us the hearts and the want-to, to obey?
Will you pray for mama too, as I pray for you?
We need each other's prayers and we need God's help."
And we proceeded to go to the GRACE room together,
asking for help in our time of need.
Side by side, admitting our weakness and our dislike sometimes of His ways
(mama and daddy's ways) but knowing that...

HE loves us.

He wants the best for us for our good and His good too.

and therefore we've got to trust Him.

but, really need His help to do so.

Now, I don't know how much of this convo this wee 3 yr old mind
really can grasp or will remember.
(I'm sure I'll find out after the next visit to Mimi's house, my mom's,
cuz that's when all the stuff from home really seems to seep out best.)

But I know I just have to keep being real with her.

Keep reminding her that mama needs Jesus just like she does.

And keep taking us both to that grace room,
asking for all His heavenly wisdom and strength and patience and love
for the obedience and training and molding and loving shaping this wee one needs.

This little trio image that I shot the other day really struck a chord,
after we had survived out little crying out and go-to-Jesus moments together... 

Isn't that just like how our Heavenly Daddy wants us to trust Him in our grown-up training up?
Enough that we let Him put our hands on the "club of life" to do our part,
but tenderly puts His great big and wise and powerful hands over ours
and really ends up doing the bulk of the work for the swing?

And that's when the shots really do end up making it in the hole
with ease and beauty and grace, isn't it?!

I think so.

I think the Bible tells us so too...

"For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him."

-Phil. 2:13, MSG 

Let's keep begging Him for this grace to obey...for us mamas and the littles in our lives.

Amish PB Fiber balls!

When these little ditties make it into the Irwin household, they will officially last about 0.5 days!

I have a slight addiction to reading Amish historical fiction books, thanks to my madre and happened to find this faboooo recipe in the back of one of the books. 

Try it! You must! You must! It may just increase your bust.

Or some other part of your body than needs more lumps and bumps, ha!

Your mini-hands around the house can even help roll the balls!

And maybe even snitch a bite or two or three, after watching mama do the same!

RECIPE
I sold you, didn't I?!

Amish High Fiber Balls
1 cup peanut butter
1 cup honey
1 cup mini chocolate chips
1 cup coconut
3 cups quick oatmeal
1/2 cup bran
1/4 tsp. salt
Stir and make firm 1" balls.

Ever get your doctrine...

rearranged by a three year old?
I just did.
While starting to crunch into our first bites of leftovers today at lunch, I remembered, mouth wide open, to thank Jesus for "feeding us today and every day."
This little literal learner whom I love the very soul of, stops me mid-prayer...
"Mama (spoken with the huff of a tweenager in all her glory),
Jesus doesn't FEED us.
He GIVES us the food.
We FEED ourselves."
Point taken.
And really unquestionable from this mama's point of view, when looking literally at the mini dimpled hand attached to the pizza slice entering her mini dimpled mouth.
You're right baby, feed on, and Jesus will keep on giving.
Case in point...

and then one more for good measure, just because I think she makes a pretty cute cool chick in shades, in the dentist's chair...

alien behavior...

image credit: buydisneycostumes.com

You know those moments that you never ever really ever want to remember ever again?
But yet you know you will never ever be able to forget?
We had one of those today.
In the diner parking lot...mama was craving a big fat juice burger. Yep, no shame here.
And as we're walking out, she and daddy are walking a little a head of mama, as the burger may or may not have slowed down mama's speed on the walk out.
Mama got about two steps away from the 3 yr old alien-exploring her new planet with strange and impulsive interactions and behaviors, I mean girl, and noticed that she had missed a split second bow down to the ground with a return prize in the hand of said child.
The prize, you ask? What might that have been?
Oh well, just a simple little half used portion of a tampon applicator.
The purple kind.
Does that make it Tampax or Playtex?
I'm not really sure.
Because all I could think of, if you could call what I was doing at that point clear thinking, was how close I was to vomiting on said child's shoes or her daddy's, if he walked any closer.
They still, both, to this point, didn't know, or understand, the horrors of what she was holding in her hand.
You see, I had been let in on the small secret as we entered the diner and saw the other half of the applicator and wondered what kind of sickness someone would have to possess to leave a remnant like this behind, in a public place.
And the horror that rushed through my blood, when realizing my darling golden curly-locked girl was now discovering this secret at a closer distance than I had allowed us on our walk in, was UNSPEAKABLE.
All I could think of at the moment was....GET it OUT of your little squishy germ and STD-free hands right.this.instant.
So, I did what any mother in her right mind would do...started hitting the purple offender with my car keys to knock it out of her hand.
I sure wasn't going to add to the horror by touching it myself!
It took 3 swift tries...and down it fell.
Back to it's destiny it should have discovered already...road kill under this mama's tires.
Blast!
The little alien and her daddy are still gawking at the mama at this point, wondering why in tarnation mama was dry-heaving and swinging her keys madly in the air at the small child's precious tender left hand.
She was only trying to show me her parking lot surprise!
I couldn't produce speech to let them know the grave offense to everything that was holy, that she had just committed.
All I could ponder was if I had left poison control's number in my phone the last time I had to use it...because couldn't they help me with some sort of answer for this sort of travesty?!
Aren't these just the calls they are waiting for, with sheets of cleansing power tips on how to rid the child of the terrors of someone's past refuse?!
Oh my.
All I could do after the heaving settled and the teary eyes (from shock or death-by-freaked-out-laughing, I'm still not sure which) stopped was huff at the dad to put the violated child in the car while profusely scrubbing her body with hand sanitizer 4 times over, vowing to continue the scrub down the second we entered the homestead door.
The cleansing did continue for about 30 minutes in the sink, while the dad kept saying the mom was highly unnecessarily grossed out, as he was sure the rain and previous car encounters had washed off any gross previous remains.
Okay, sure, I said...well then leave me alone to my freakouts!
I'm sure there's some other mama out there who has been through some horror of the sort who will encourage my weary mama-of-daily-alien-behavior-heart or at least freak out and heave with me!
I was right.
Team mama to the rescue!
My handy texting machine rallied the troops and the small gathering of us all lost our lunch together and promised to watch our little aliens more closely while in the local diner parking lot.
Watch them mamas.
The little aliens in our lives will stop at nothing short than total child-imposed/intended freakouts for the mamas who love their little dear hearts.
After a full shower down cleansing, (because following the "incident" and subsequent scourings, there was a need to scoot around the whole toilet seat with a poo-soiled bottom, to see if the whole seat would really turn brown--it did, if you were wondering and the heaving and scouring continued on) we have entered into nap zone in these parts.
Do you think she'll give me an extra long pause and deep breath to myself today?!
Probably not.
Father help us mamas, for they know not what they do, these aliens you have put into our supervisory territory.
We love them deeply and dearly nonetheless.
And what would we do without our recognized moment-by-moment need for You and hearty doses of mama patience, settled nerves and tummies, gentleness and grace?
Amen.
Thank you for joining me for this regularly crazily scheduled moment in my Irwin-adventuresome day!
Never a dull moment here with this darling alien-exploring-her-new-planet on the loose!

that’s all it takes?!

Mr. Bubble and

 4 varying size bowls?!

 

and a fave-o-rite baby doll?!

Why didn’t anybody tell me the giggles and oodles of non-troubling finding fun we’d have?!
We’ll be making these messes much more often in mama’s kitchen!!

“Do you think she likes it mama?!””Oh honey, I think she’s in love with head dunks…wouldn’t you be?! I’ll try it on you in the bath tonight, and you tell me how you think she felt!” “Okay, fun!”

It doesn’t take much folks!

I don’t know why in tarnation we think they need all these new-fangled gadgets!

Oh the joys of the simpler things!

AND an added bonus…a spickin’ span floor after clean-up!

holding HIS words dear...

Luke 2:19, 51
...Mary kept all these things to herself, holding them dear, deep within herself.
...His mother held these things dearly, deep within herself.

Even her, the chosen mother, the mama who carried Him within, till the fullness of His birth time, the one who wiped up skinned knees, and cupped handfuls of little boy tears knew the importance of treasuring her Son's, her God's, every word deep within her being, to roll around over and over, and allow them to tenderly penetrate and thus change her life forever.
Shouldn't we have meditative Mary hearts, all the more?

      (image credit: redletterchristians.org)

Giving thanks for the valley...

After speaking of a particularly trying season in her life of deep lack, author Jan Karon speaks of God's goodness in the midst of it all...
"What I learned mostly, however, is that God is faithful. He really does love us. And here's what some may have trouble believing:
HE REALLY DOES WANT THE BEST FOR HIS CHILDREN.
If you're on a painful journey through the valley, ask Him to walk through it with you. Make some chicken soup from chicken bones, and give thanks. And when you finally get to the mountaintop, give thanks for the valley you've just been through. Because you will almost certainly go there again. And again, it will be hard.
But it will be good."
Learning to look for and taste His goodness in times of little and much.
-just a little sheep, following hard after my Good Shepherd, down in the valleys and up and over the mountaintops

let the merry begin!

through her little lookingglass...

My theory is that sometimes it's just good...
to get a three year old's perspective
on life
through her lens.

It doesn't matter if it's not perfect, off-kilter, and a little hazy,
as long as it brings a smile...
is all that really matters in her little 3 foot world.

Grace or Law...

What are you living under?
You already-saved Christians!
Did you begin in the Spirit and are now trying to live out by the law-driven flesh?!
Check this chart to find out and see...

The Grace List
by Tim Kimmel

The Obedience-based Life	vs.	The Grace-based Life
You live to impress God	vs.	You live to trust God
A performance	vs.	A relationship
A duty	vs.	A delight
Predictable	vs.	Fluid
Promotes fear	vs.	Promotes faith
Creates worry	vs.	Creates calm
Masked	vs.	Transparent
Critical Spirit	vs.	Compassionate Spirit
Sense a lot of guilt	vs.	Sense a lot of freedom
Inclines you towards pridefulness	vs.	Inclines you towards humility
Outside-in management	vs.	Inside-out surrender
For “church” people	vs.	For everybody
More natural	vs.	More supernatural
Focuses on being good	vs.	Focuses on being connected
Lends itself to self-righteousness	vs.	Lends itself to organic obedience  Praying He makes me a grace-based live-er, more and more. I need it. And so does my family!  "And from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace." -John 1:16

a baby, an aunty and her cousin!

What a sweet sweet joy it's been to snuggle this little for the past few days!

Does God give any gifts more precious than these itty bitty lives?!

I truly think not.

Children are a GIFT from the Lord, they are a reward from Him.

-Psalm 127:3

Happy Falloween to you!

Have you manuevered through the maze yet?!

Go get out there and do it!

Why don't we play crazy with them more often?!

Don't they make life a heap more enjoyable, these littles in our lives?!

And a lot less, "life...just get it done, and get through it."

Seeing more of it down at their level and through their eyes, 

sure makes it all seem more grand.

Of such is the kingdom of heaven, in this mama's book.

twins!

Any happy hen that can labor & deliver
could-have-been-twins in the form of
a hurkin' huge golden egg,
in my urban farmyard,
deserves a big fat badge of hen honor in my book!

Go Happy Hen!!!
And go happy breakfast eaters!

Let's get True-Faced here...

Let the redeemed of the LORD say so, 

Whom He has redeemed from the hand of the enemy...  

-Ps. 107:2

Who's got junk in their life?! (big personal hands-up)
Who's got really big messes that need a lot of clean-up?! (big personal hands-up)
Who knows they aren't perfect and really needs a really perfect Savior to get them through life, for pete's sake, through every day for that matter?! (big personal hands-up)


So, I figured if the people whose lives we are around and a part of every day have seen the real true-faced me...why not the worldwideweb?!

I told the hubbs and the pastor, that if only 1 life, 1 family could be enlightened, freed, impacted by the story of a big God fixing a measly little fearful-which-produces-control-or-angry girl...
then it was all worth it. 
Worth all the honesty, all the realness, all the ugliness, all the humbling it took, all the courage that had to be drummed up in Him,
to share the beauty He can make out of my ugly mess.
TO HIM BE THE GLORY. 
SERIOUSLY.

Which means He can more than make one out of yours too.
He's a more than enough kinda God, that's how I know it's true.

View on and see how I know how (interview done with my hubbs and my pastor for our FearLess series at church this fall)...



Krystal Irwin's full interview from Larry Whitaker on Vimeo.

There is no fear in love; 

but perfect LOVE casts out fear, 

because fear involves torment.

But he who fears 

has not been made perfect in love.

-1 John 4:18

Let Love, Jesus, cast out all fear.

So you can live in freedom

and have abundant life.

In this is perfection, 

nothing else.

That IS what He went to the cross for.

If I don't know much of anything else...

I know this much is true.

the transformation...

is happening before my eyes!

The adventures of happy girl and her Happy Hen...

Meet happy girl's favorite friend...Happy Hen

Meet happy girl and her daddy's favorite activity with Happy Hen...

Slide Time!

Happy Hen says "it looks kind of yellow and high and slippery"...

"Are you sure about this happy girl?" -Happy Hen

"I'm sure. Now would you just, ugh, work with me here, Happy Hen?!" -happy girl

"What in tarnation just happened to me?!" -Not so Happy Hen

"Blaaahhhh!!!" -Not so Happy Hen

"What.was.that?" -Not so Happy Hen

"Do my wings look like hers?!" -very happy girl

"Whoa! That was awesome!" -still very happy girl

"Can we talk about this?!" -Not so Happy Hen & happy girl's daddy

"I don't feel so happy anymore." -Not so Happy Hen & still very happy girl's daddy

"Now let's try that one more time Happy Hen." -very very happy girl

"Blaaahhhh!!!" -Very Unhappy Hen

"Why I oughtta!" -Very very Unhappy Hen

"Humph. Do my wings still look ok? I'm so going back to my roost." -Very very very Unhappy Hen

"Here I come Happy Hen, let's try that again!" -very very happy girl

"Why are you running away from me Happy Hen?!" -very confused happy girl

"Oh well, there's always 5 other happy hens to go try again with!" -happy happy girl